Do you feel that you are running away from your life?
This can sound insane but I’ve learned that so much pain can be your best friend answering the question: what is the key to success in life? What is required to do it? What do I need to become the person I want to be?
I love creating questions. I seriously believe that the quality of our lives has a direct relationship with the quality of the questions we ask ourselves all the time. If you feel that you’ve heard this quote before is because Tony Robbins is his creator. I follow his work because I think he’s an amazing human being who teaches proven methods with tangible results. For me, that’s extremely valuable.
Anyway, let’s start,
Stop Your Ego and Model Success
What does “model success” mean?
In general terms, it is an association we create to find a way to integrate to our lives some beliefs of someone else has and is getting the results we want. I’ll give you a mental picture.
What is the first reaction of a baby boy (or girl) during the first year when you look at him directly? He pays all his attention to you and just learns. At that moment he is modeling you! His brain is creating new neural connections and at the same time that he creates a roadway of energy (nervous impulse) for next similar situations. His brain starts the process of conditioning itself.
There is something really good with this and something really bad. The good stuff is we never lose this capability to learn and model (except with some mental diseases), the bad aspect is that we are not aware of this important issue and we model disempowering behaviors for the rest of our lives.
Don’t worry! This is not going to happen to you. If you are here is because you want something better for your life and you are taking actions to achieve it.
Summarizing, with this extremely powerful ability that you have inherited from the evolution you can learn any skill you want. You just need to follow blindly to the person who already has that skill and do what he or she does.
Wait for a second, I am not talking about do if you already know the skill (although it would be good, anyway). I mean live their life. Figure out what are their habits, the people who they meet, what do they eat? What do they like? What do they do at the weekends? Do they watch TV or read books? Everything!
This is not about destroying yourself following someone else. It is about to build yourself in the way you really want to be created. Remember, we are who we are because of our experiences and our references, but our interpretations are the main factor who determines our identity. Our identity was taught us for our family and for society, not for ourselves.
I believe in freedom with all my heart so… is there a better definition of freedom that has the opportunity to create our life in the exact way we want?
Your first step? Take energy from those who have it!
Believe in Yourself
Believe me, you can change. But before we can keep going you should answer this question for yourself, do you believe that you can? This is the most important aspect, what do you believe about yourself?
“Believe” has an incredible power into our head.
It is not who you are, it is who you think you are. Your behaviors will be manifested in the way your brain perceives that you are through your experiences and memories.
If you eliminate those disempowering beliefs you’re going to be able to focus on the things that can help you to achieve your Best Version.
Surround Yourself With High Standard People
What are you looking for with people? Ideas.
When you get surrounded with your friends or your family you share experiences, insights, ideas, connections, perceptions, etc. But, what happens when those ideas do not empower you?
I’ll give one example. Please, imagine this. You are in a living room playing poker with your five or six best friends on a Saturday night. All of them connects with you and you are having a wonderful time. At the end of the night, you decide to put on your black sweater or your soft jersey when you notice that is not there. You ask each one of your friends for your sweater and all of them tell you “you came without a sweater, man! Are you OK? Are you feeling OK?”. Even if you’re completely sure that you had brought your jacket, your brain will start a little “beep” like: “Are you sure that you brought a sweater? Maybe, I misunderstood something and we came without a sweater!”.
Right here is what I am talking about! It doesn’t matter if you had a sweater that night or not, the important point is that you would doubt even feeling centain. Your brain will change some interpretations and you can start coming up with ideas like: “maybe I left it over the couch before going out from home? Or maybe I left it in the car?” And so on.
This is just one example of the power of a good and positive environment. Don’t allow you to be surrounded by disempowering labels. If you’re in a place where everybody thinks you’re an idiot, even being a genius you’ll act like an idiot.
“People’s lives are a direct reflection of the expectations of their peer group” by Tony Robbins.
Fortunately, it works in a reverse way too. If you are a disaster managing your time or your finances but you are surrounded with leaders, attorneys, financial advisers, you’ll start to learn how to improve in those areas and you won’t even notice it.
Create an Ultimate Vision
When you have a powerful vision of where you want to be in the coming years your life changes immediately.
The best gift you can afford for yourself is the possibility to reach those dreams that you have independently of how crazy they can look right now.
Write down your vision, what do you want in life? Ask this question every morning and every night. See it!
Clarity is power. As clearer is your vision, as closer you’re of achieving it.
Take the time to plan your life. The results are unbelievable. See the big picture and apply “reverse engineer”. Break it down a wonderful view in small steps that you can accomplish.
Ex: you are living in New York and you want to go to LA. Create your road map to arrive there. How are you going to do it without a road map?
You can go to Pittsburg first, later to Columbus and after that to Indianapolis. Whatever is the plan you choose is not going to be important, the important thing is to have one!
Take Massive Action
The last step but not the least.
In my experience it is the most important step of all because, without action, there’s nothing. Even if you act massively without a plan there is a possibility that you can find your way but without action, we’re died.
Don’t feel overwhelmed with this powerful phrase, please! You don’t need to arrive at LA on the first day. Enjoy your journey but understanding where you want to be. Following that metaphor, you won’t go to Miami because is out of your way to arrive at your desired target. Or Madrid, London, anyway.
When you listen to this phrase remember that the marathon starts with the first step. Start small. If you love junk food you can not expect to stop immediately without have incredible tons of pain. Start with an apple. Later with two apples. Later with your breakfast and so on.
As I learned from Stefan James, “emotions are determined by motion”. Can you imagine yourself running and feeling the desire to procrastinate? No. As fast you move, your energy will grow too. If you think about it when you have a feeling you start acting in consistency with that feeling. Therefore, when you do something, your feelings will be linked with those actions. So if you want to stay positive, keep moving forward.
The Final Key
If you breathe, you’re alive. That’s all that we need to achieve all our dreams.
Every morning is a gift, be aware of that and go out to eat the world. Because the world wants to see your Best Version!